Neil Gaiman says:

Neil Gaiman says:
pic by Allan Amato

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Well, what next

It's been a blurred flurry of activity, stress, stark terror, excitement, madness. Never, ever wish for "change", especially if you're happy and warm in your own particular pile of sh*t! Cause sometimes you get what you wish for. Good Lord, never anticipated the whirl and speed with which this project is thrusting. All tentacles, no head. If that makes any kind've Chthulian sense.

We had another day of training, going through a stack of documents that only served to confuse me even more. People who had been out in the field collecting Census from lost souls that hadn't yet been "got" told their stories. I felt the mad fear running through my veins, as I envisaged my own trial of fire in the field that coming evening. Flight/Fight panic pounding in my blood..and the irony is that I had chosen this. But why? I hate having to knock on doors, interract with people--what the hell came over me? And now I'm just rolling along in this pulsing ball of wax going "What do I DO? What do I DO??"

After training, I had a modest supper at the Cottage; the very place I'd had my first beer with Leah, wayy back in the Fall (seems like a lifetime ago!) Spicy quesadilla, rice and a cold Steamwhistle to wash it all down. Did more Decode sketches for the "Ivy & Dummy" promo project, that helped keep my mind from jabbering and gibbering. Helped keep me from running to the car and skiving off from the field experience.

Got back to Stats early and NW, the Chief of Survey Operations Division was there. I connected better with her today, I think. There were 9 of us in total, with our crew Supervisor Eric. We carpooled to the first place (because after, we were to try and do field work downtown at the condo where the old Daly bldg used to be on 700 Sussex. Yes, the same condo where Alanis Morissette lives! ooh!)

My hands were shaking, and I couldn't breathe. I tried to stay cool and calm, my cultish-alien silver satchel on my hip. This swell girl, Xi-yun was amazing; she knocked on doors and rattled off the spiel without a pause for breath and while the people blinked in amazement, shoved a 2A form their way, along with a pen. I tagged after her, trying to learn by osmosis the procedure, and get a little courage to rub off on me as well!

When we'd finished with our first bldg, we headed for the Market. It vaguely reminded me of my 2nd class of Driver's Ed, when our instructor took us to the Market on a Saturday morning. All the feelings were the same: fear, woeful unpreparedness, more fear, oh yes and the knowledge that no matter what came pass, you were liable to fuck it up somehow. And the fear.

I shouldn't have worried though, because after hoofing it for close to 3 1/2 hours, all over the Market, up Sussex, down Clarence, up Dalhousie, down George and across to York... 90% of the places we tried to get into were barred to us. Either people slammed their phones down when we tried to call to get buzzed in, or security dudes had no clue as to protocol for our non-guest, non-tenant status, or places were simply locked with a blank keypad to which we had no cypher or key to access. The excersize served to rub out the fear, like an emotional brillo-pad on over-wrought, rusty nerves. By the time we were clustered on Dalhousie, like a lost tour group, all I wanted was to get home Home HOME.

Thankfully, the lady who'd carpooled us there was in the same frame of mind, and (eventually) homeward we sped.

Rumours abound! Two of my friends take their first tour tomorrow, and are flying out to either Fort McMurray or Grande Prairie AB. As far as I know, I am probably on Monday's list...but I have no idea where I'm going. Could be AB, could be Montreal, could be Toronto, heck maybe even Ottawa/Gatineau or Kingston. It's good to be in the loop, eh?

More news as I get it! Now, to prepare, clean, shop, pack, read, phone, organize... ACK Pfffblblpbpttt! (As Bill the Cat would say.)


Anonymous said...

Hey Sue,
Remember that sense of adventure and excitement that you felt when you first signed up for the opportunity? Grab onto that! You could see a new city, get lots of fresh air and meet some interesting characters. And, if it makes you feel any better, I was one of the folk that had to be hunted down with a census form. Yes, it's true. And when the girl came to my door and explained the situation, I invited her in for lemonade while we filled out the form.
How long will you be "on the job"? Keep in touch if you can ... you may have "nieces" or "nephews" soon ...

Eifriger said...

Thanks Carol! Good to hear from you :-) I should be away about a month or so. Yes, I'm a bit calmer now.. and I am excited (it's just it sometimes gets wrapped in the terror :-O) That's cool that Stats had to "hunt you down". Too bad they don't need Field Agents in PEI :-) I'll try talking to you before I jet off... take care darlin!

Anonymous said...

Hey Sue,
Going to miss you. just keep cool and you'll be fine. I've done this b4 and its no sweat. At first I was all nervous to knock on doors and actually TALK to ppl. But once you do a couple of them you'll be fine. Im sure you will meet all sorts of interesting and NICE ppl. Of course there will be the odd one, but dont let that slow you down. Just take good care of yourself and I'll see you soon, hopefully, that is if non of those "crack growing farmers" kidnap you and make you smoke it all day.. haha!

ps.What really sucks is that your going to miss my bday :( Then again everyone is, cause no one is at work. It seems like the gods are against me! haha!

Eifriger said...

Thanks for the encouragement John--you are always there when needed to offer one of your nice big shoulders to lean on. That means so much! I am SO going to miss you, and your bday.. :-( When I get back we'll celebrate in style, maybe take you out to a Japanese place, or to the Toys on Fire store, or a movie! Whatever you would like. Take things easy dude, I may see you tomorrow if I'm in. Hugs *smile*